Fear/Loving : A personal narrative of aging, intimacy and separation
[ FUJIFILM / YOUNG TALENT AWARD 2017 – SHORT LIST ]
Fear/Loving is a self-reflective body of work, encompassing experiences shared by those closest to me. Fear of abandonment has been a weight I have carried my entire life, emerging into reality during my early twenties following the separation of my parents after 26 years of marriage. This divided union began to divide me. Investing time and energy into another person became unattainable; expressing my feelings toward another, crippling. Photographing became my coping mechanism, evoking emotional and physical connections which were previously undiscovered. I started becoming a witness to my fears taking hold of others just the same.
Growing older, we begin to break the mold of our inherent innocence, realizing that few things last forever. Losing the image we previously had of ourselves, we continue to tirelessly and obsessively look through our individual narratives, desperate to detect what may have gone wrong. An unavoidable and often paralyzing feeling begins to take hold, just as light fades among the trees, so do our past selves and past experiences. To find solace, we search among nature, vices, people – anchoring ourselves to something in order to cope.
Seeking attachment, satisfaction and support – we take refuge in love. An individualized experience which manifests into various forms over time. The type of connection one seeks; interpersonal, metaphysical, biophilic – temporary or permanent. The type of support we wish for; emotional, physical, financial. The types of relationships to be discovered; platonic, sexual, self-deprecating.
As aging continues, so do our bonds – they shift, manipulate themselves into unfamiliar faces, sometimes disappearing entirely. Tethering ourselves to family, friends and new loves, we try to dull the pain of fleeting affections – hoping they will morph into everlasting form. The individuals in these images fall into those descriptions.
Brooklynn T. Kascel graduated from The University of Iowa in 2016 with degrees in Journalism and Sociology. During her time in school, Brooklynn worked as a photographer for The Daily Iowan. While on staff, she received 5th place from the Associated Collegiate Press for the 2016 Multimedia Story of the Year Award with a photo slideshow documenting a political rally in support of Donald Trump. Upon graduation, she went on to accept an assistant position with VII Photo’s, Danny Wilcox Frazier. Frazier is a recipient of multiple grants and fellowships including: Aaron Siskind Foundation, Individual Photographer’s Fellowship (2016), Emergency Fund, Magnum Foundation (2016). Brooklynn’s work has been published by the Associated Collegiate Press and The Daily Iowan. She lives in Minneapolis, Minnesota.
The Emerging Photographer Fund is supported by generous donors to the Magnum Foundation