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Little pieces of us
When I was still not even a teenager, I lost my mother to breast cancer. I still remember the night she died vividly, its an image etched in my mind that will stay there for a long time. There are other images too, of happy times and of sad times, memories that were strong enough to survive. However, as time passes, these memories fade. This is probably good on some level, but it also robs us of the fundamental building blocks of our life.
After my son was born, I realized that this would continue. As time passed, small details that gave me joy were forgotten, evaporating away, their place taken by new memories that inevitably also faded away. I realized then that it was up to me to try and collect these little pieces, to give them a permanence that my memory could not.
And so my collection began. Trying not so much to chronicle important dates and events, birthdays or visits to a doctor. Instead, I wanted to capture images that communicated the feeling of the moment, a drive home in the pouring rain, or a moment of uninhibited play.
Photographs: Rafal Pruszynski
Website: www.flickr.com/photos/jinju/
I like this essay a lot. Straight forward photography. Nicely paced. Clearly there are many more images that would be interesting to see. I wonder how many photographers use their talent to capture their personal lives? Probably too few. We’re always looking outward.
I actually confronted the same question about saving memories with my camera years ago but came to the opposite conclusion you did. The details are never as sweet as the memories for me. We all look at life differently.
Nice work.
It is immediately apparent to me; after seeing other work at Burn Magazine, that Rafal is from, or lives, in the East. On first look, I like it Rafal, although I’m sure that I will like it more with more study; I find that Oriental (for want of a better term) photography is usually more than the sum of its parts. I love frame 16! Keep up the work Rafal, you and your family will reap the reward. Congratulations on publication here at Burn!
Best wishes,
Mike.
Mike, exactly. Whatever the influence, I like the esthetic in these photos.
short on time rafal, and so just a very quick congratulations..
more in time..
brilliant opener…
david
Best of compliments I’m stupidly able to offer, Rafal! Moving work. It lets me into your life but isn’t pushy about it. You might be interested in a similar project by Todd Deutsch: http://todddeutsch.com/familydaysthumbs.php
Mike and Jim, your irrelevant stereotype needs an update. Rafal is a Polish photographer working in Korea.
Hey, stupid. (always wanted to say that). I was careful to say, “whatever the influence” because I had no idea (until now) where Rafal was.
Wow,
I promised myself that the first post under my essay would be to thank Anton. David, you too, but Anton is the guy who had to put up with a lot during the edit. So Anton, big big thanks for your work.
Well I am not Asian.
Actually Stupid is right. I am a Polish and Canadian actually guy in Korea. Not a Korean but probably in a way Koreanized by 7 years here and a Korean wife.
Stupid,
I had never seen that. I like it and will look more. But I am really into this kind of photography. One thing, people say flickr sucks but I would like to invite people to see http://lafamiliaabrazada.tumblr.com/ which is a selection of images from a flickr group I co-administer.
As far as influences I could write more if anyone is interested.
Jim,
actually I was sure you would poo poo it…see, you arent the only one jumping to conclusions.
I would love to hear more about your influences..from the start I have been moved and fascinated by the way you work, and also by your life and how amazing your wife must be to let you so close with the camera..certain singles are more gripping for me than others, but always I have the same reaction of joy / wonder / intrigue to your work as a whole. Such a inside – out way of being and seeing.. And this series is a great gift to your family, as well as to yourself (and to us)..congratulations!!
Really unconventional take on a rather familiar subject (family)…I really love Rafal’s essay. Thanks for sharing…
Best Wishes…
Erica,
well there are a few and for different reasons. For example I never used to shoot with flash, ever. Then I saw Billingham’s Ray’s a Laugh and it sort of clicked how the exaggerated technical flaws really work with this sort of subject, the sort of common family album theme. I had always been a lover of b/w though in a much different context. I think that saying Nan Goldin would be a given, I think anyone thats trying to do an intimate document has been in a way influenced by her. Another influence is Jacob aue Sobol, in conjunction with Billingham. When I saw the images from Ray’s a Laugh it really clicked and thats what really started me going for a high contrast look in my b/w. Many of the images are shot with on camera flash from inches away. It was one way for me to sort of bring that technically flawed aesthetic into it that you often see in family albums.
Erica,
my wife was good about it from the start, there really was never much of an issue with this..certain types of photos took a bit of warming up to get but it didnt take all that long. But hell yeah, it does take two to tango and theres no way this could be done otherwise.
“Little Pieces of Us”? or “Little Pieces of Them”?
really lovely work, but I would like to see some little pieces of you in these photos as well. anyway, congratulations Rafal, really cool stuff
Maciej,
true, true, its something Im still grappling over..how to include myself successfully..I have not taken a successful image yet that would do that…I have relied on artifacts, for example the image of the glasses, or theres an image of my had and my son’s foot. But its definitely a frame Im hunting.
I don’t think we as the viewer need to literally see Rafal, his presence is felt in these photographs. I think the photographer is always present in the photographs he takes, especially with such close up and intimate shots such as these. Rafal’s child isn’t looking out into space, he is looking at his father. We the viewer see that. “Little Pieces of Us” is definitely a fitting title for this project.
Rafal, I found your photoessay really inspiring. as somebody who calls himself a documentary photographer i too often forget that personal experiences can make photographs as poignant and powerful as any esteemed documentary work. nice attention to mood. very personal and subtle. I would love to see the images printed and hung in a gallery.
Matt,
so would I….but let’s call Burn a gallery:)
Rafal!
“a tree is known by its fruit”-family proverb
I have loved watching this story develop and unfold…having seen lots of the pics and seen lots of variations, it’s been a real pleasure to see this work grow and enfold. As I have written many times, I love the quiet drama of these photographs, as well as the series Family Ties. If Family Ties is like an Ozu film, this series is like an extended Haiku…filled with so much silence and all the visual space, the quiet surrounding of family life…what i love best about this shortened version is the sequence, as it moves from the child toward the dark, from the center of the 3 of you (your son, your wife and the absent u) toward the 2 of you (the wife) and the dark, gorgeous intimacy of creation…burning toward the absence of elements, only the rich abstract shadow of love and light and dark and depth…the movement and the progression of the essay is great…really, i loved how it moved from ‘readable’ images and images that it is very easy for viewers to enjoy (who doesnt love a child) toward the darker and more ambiguous imagery, toward sexuality, toward bodies, toward disappearance….bereavement and joy….
as others have written, i too think all that matters is to focus around and in front of you, and this story is filled with the beautiful sentiment (as opposed to sentimentality) of family and also the sadness and the strange, quarky oddity (love the eye glasses motif and your wife’s face-max)…the foot clothed by shadow is also gorgeous…
a successful successful and beautiful story…and it really has been a pleasure to hone this, to see your work grow and mature and become more complex and more ambiguous…that’s what family and children do to us…makes us feel wider, larger: more joy, more sorrow….
a beautiful and honest and humane story….and i LOVE it….all the pics…even the ones you’ve not shown here L::))
looking forward to the book
cheers
bob
Bob,
a huge thanks has to go to David. I see now the real value of a good eye and an unbiased perspective thanks to his huge help with editing this. But he is also a great sport and it was a fun process playing some edit ping pong with him. Yes the series has gone through many, many edits and I think it is at a point now where Im comfortable with how it hangs together.
Hey Jim, I think there is a damned lot of inward/personal lives photography attempts done in the past 2 decades. In the context of what you are saying, Marcin does bring the paradox, maybe, of Rafal’s not being in the frame (his only “objects” there being wife and kid, whom actually do not BELONG to him, as objects might) something he acknowledged and talked about a while ago, on Road trip.
Rafal, I only regret there are only a couple dozen shots in the essay presented here. I guess for many of us, who have been following your journey from afar, your essay has long taken the form of a book, even if only imagined, and hell if I ever buy a book with only a dozen pictures in it! :-))))
You could borrow some wildlife photographer’s traps and have your wife stick them somewhere — open the fridge and wham! I too was left wanting to see you involved… but I suspect that’s a tricky task, as you mentioned.
The photos IMHO are built around tight spaces, bathroom, bedroom, inside a taxicab, tight crop in a restaurant. They work well. But I wonder if you hadn’t thought about trying to put your intimacy up against the world. How do you fit in with your neighbors and the rest of us…? That’s the question I’m left with.
This is one one would really like to see expanded into a book.
Herve,
I had the goal of having less than 30 images in this sort of presentation as I thought its the optimum number for a slideshow. There are more images but I think that a slideshow isnt the best way to show so many.
P.S. you mean Maciej lol
Mickael,
good question. To be more accurate this project is part of a larger personal project. I had visions of also photographing my side of the family but geography has made that difficult. The other project Im currently shooting that runs in conjunction with this is one about my wife’s side of the family called Family Ties. Again there are distance issues that Id like to be able to overcome, but atleast I can get down there from time to time, being only about 5 hours away. Finally I am also collecting images of domestic artifacts which could much better be sequenced with the 2 other projects into a book format than a slideshow format. As Jim says obviously the dream would be a book in the future.
lovely personal photographs
the crumpled sheets and hand..
again…
the legs
the diner
the shower…
sensual
strong emotions..
universal..
maternal..
love the way you frame
and your use of negative space..
beautiful,
strong body of work..
** i’m sure your mother is so proud.. **
peace and love Rafal..
to you and yours…
**
**
Oops, Maciej, yes…..
BTW, Rafal, I got used to it, but please, do not put the title picture on the cover of the book. Said jokingly, but when i first saw it ( no doubt following Panos’s lust and love longing for someone else’s GF….)), I thought ARAKI sent one of his sicko essays to David… Then I saw your name…..:-))))
No….that must be the book cover. I can see this on the bookstore shelf. It’s perfect for a cover.
dear rafal,
i should thank you for your essay.
i too was father-orphaned by cancer when i was very young. i too have young kids, my youngest a little older than yours… pieces… yes, pieces… at all costs, my responsibility to live for my kids…
your write up just about killed me. i could only get to the 8th picture of the slideshow and the rest started swimming right in front of me.
sadly, i might turn BURN off for a while.
MICHAEL…
yours is an interesting question and i hope Rafal answers…i am sure he will…how much to include in any essay?? stories/lives always have many branches, but do we really need to see the whole tree????
too bad i have to pack and catch a plane, because i would love to jump in on this one…..this is such an interesting part of any story/essay…the “confinements” of it…
cheers, david
p.s. whoops, i see that Rafal did already answer….this was a subject that Rafal and i have talked about a lot…where to begin, where to end……and even if Rafal expands this essay to segue into the other, i am sure this one will always stand on its own…
Hey Rafal, nice intimate work, subtle. Good to see another story develop through Road trips and now appear here on burn. I think Maciej made a good point. I agree would be interesting to see you interact in a few of these frames. Not obvious though! Just a few subtle abstractions. This should be no problem for you as this gentle approach is part of your working style already. I guessing you already have some like this, did you it not work for you?
… Just looked back 12 has your hand right?
RAFAL
What an exquisite edit. Like a polished jewel. I too have been anxiously awaiting seeing your essay here on Burn. After having folowed its evolution over the past year I feel I know you and your family intimately. But this edit shows me something new: it is a poem instead of an essay. You have whittled this massive undertaking down to its bare essence and it sings! Yes, there are lots of images I miss and look forward to seeing in your book, but this particular edit will always stay with me. There is nothing extraneous here; each element is placed in perfect relationship to the others, like building blocks that would topple if even one were moved. I know how incredibly hard it is to do an edit of a long term project so I can appreciate what you’ve done in a very personal way.
Bravo to you, Rafal, and sincere gratitude to your wife for being open to the process. As for me, the title is apt–you are as much a subject as your wife and son. I feel you present in every image. I wouldn’t try to work your physical self into future images, not unless it happens naturally. Now it is time to get serious about pulling your book together. I sense it will be the first of many…and I look forward to buying them all!
Patricia
Very personal…an intimacy that comes through as fragmented as our memories…like stream of consciousness imagery and remembrance. This is the quality about it that I like…we are viewing how Rafal will recall these times and moments… this is the objective of a lot of photography…to record moments as they happen, but this recording is different… It seems as though we are privy to how these moments are actually seen and kept in his brain, and these pieces of past times are recalled as such…shards of moments passed and past. Beautiful work.
rafal.
fantastic and well deserved that your work is gaining wide and sincere appreciation.. really pleased for you and the family.
nothing can prepare us for loosing a parent, right?
and loosing one young.. well.. it´s a right of passage which we are not mean´t to pass through at that time.. too many missed conversations.. the development of parents as friends.. who deserve our empathy.. their privilege to see us grow and ´become´… so much lost, while all that is gained is a a maturity which is unwanted and thrust on us too young.
i totally get your project and think it´s a touching dedication to your family of old as well as a beautiful illustration of your family of now.
the longest life for you and yours
david and family.
also – your family looks beautiful..
thanks for allowing us in..
families and the love between them are wonderful things. I often wonder why we dont, given our trade, do so much more than we do to capture that.These are obviously pieces made with love and commitment. There is a tenderness in them, an intimacy. People are really moved by them. I cannot help but wonder ‘Why am I not?’ How is it that what stirs the hearts of others does not reach me? I can ‘SEE’ what is there and intuit from it the sense that it evokes, but only as an abstract thought. I DO NOT FEEL HERE. WHY? ..I have no idea. It cannot be the work as it seems to have stirred just about everyone [even you JIM :) ]
Therefore it is within me. [Maybe I always knew that anyway]. It is not the things in a frame that I am magnetic to, it is the geometry of the frame itself and the tones and spacing of the things within it. Therefore, something such as this which is so obviously full of love is a blank mirror, and yet a static image of say a piece of cloth hanging in the wind can hit me like a hammer.
Its a lovely thing you have here and have made…cherish it.
john
Really nice edit – i imagine a lot of these are familiar to others through flickr – they feel fresh again. It felt like a journey at times.
When and why did you decide on b&w for this? Was it based on an influence or an concious decision taken early in this ‘project’? I mean you’re pretty handy at subtly toned colour photography elsewhere in your work: did you like the resulting contrast from presenting this more personal stuff in b&w and your outside observational (for want of a better way of describing it) work in colour?
Sobol’s influence mostly shines through here. Your work Rafal reminds me so much of his. But I liked this photo essay more, even if some of the images sway too close to Sobol’s work. I think it is the mother and child relationship which makes it me interesting for me.
I am not one for seeing photographers shadows or remote shutter cables, anything that emphasizes the presence of the photographer, but I am nitpicking there. Thank you or sharing, I’ve been waiting and this doesn’t disappoint.
The convergence of Art and Life. i’ve seen this set so many times, but i never get tired of it, just tired of the envy of wishing i could do something as beatiful and as meaninful myself.
The convergence of Art and Life. i’ve seen this set so many times, but i never get tired of it, just tired of the envy of wishing i could do something as beatiful and as meaninful myself.
Rafal,
Great to see your essay presented here.I hope you will always continue to work on this, even as you work on other projects, even after “the book” is done.
The part of “you” that is included here is your love for your family and how proud you are to share them with us. thanks for that.
Well, I guess I’m going to have to be the first, and maybe only, prick who doesn’t really
get this piece.
I can appreciate the sentimentality and personal moments at play but the overpowering use of flash
just gets in the way, for me, and leaves me cold and unengaged.
I did like frames 13,18, and 19 and, not surprisingly there was no apparent use of flash.
As well,in these frames I felt the compositions allowed one to speculate as to what might be going
on outside of the viewable frame while most of the others were sort of direct-here’s a child in a room
with a ceiling,FLASH; here’s a woman near a shower,FLASH;….
ALL…
i will be absent until about this time tomorrow (late afternoon or evening Euro time on the 13th)..no new posts until i arrive in Spain…but, i think you have enough to keep you busy until then…
cheers, david
Crazy stuff Rafal. It actually makes me want to go and grab a flash, something I’ve used a lot in my career but not lately. The only thing I would say is don’t discount the birthday parties, doctor visits, etc out of hand. Don’t limit yourself in any way because of some sort of preconceived notions about what art is or isn’t. Congrats on getting this up here. Looking forward to what you do next. CP
Hey Rafal, wonderful work. I’ve always liked this project because when I look at it I really feel the love, and I don’t mean that in any trite way. There is one photo from an earlier edit, however, that I miss…if I remember correctly…it was a photo of your son in the bathtub, looking out from behind the shower curtain, or something like that. Am I imagining this? It’s the photo I was hoping to see when I looked at this edit because for some reason it has stayed with me.
chris
RAFAL – great essay. i love the intimacy of the images. i think the second half is stronger than the first – but there are some real wonderful images in this essay. i like what Ramanan said above that your presence is in every image – the glasses on the window sill, the shower, etc. nice work.
Hi Rafal,
Your use of reflection and angle are uncanny.
However, I agree with John Gladdy and Mark, I am left with a sense of disconnect after viewing these images (not all of them) but, in general. For me… the harshness of the flash distracts from the delicate sensitivity that exists in the documentation of your family.
I checked out your Flickr link, and I like the images in color, they have a vibrancy which I feel, is missing in the black and white work. But, that might be your intent… mine is just an opinion.
Rafal
I love this essay, and also the longer version on your site.
Living with a camera at arms reach helps us recognise and celebrate the miracle of our own individual lives. What could be more important? Too easily our lives can just stream by with all those beautiful moments un-noticed. The difference between the ordinary and the extra-ordinary is just a matter of perception.
My own personal work has always been just that, very personal, and completely different from the photographs I make for a living. I’ve never shared it.
Thankyou for sharing these personal photos with us, and allowing us a peek at your day to day reality. You and Patricia have given me something to think about.
Cheers
Gordon L
Rafal,
nice work! Image 2 and 5 are my absolute favourites!
Had a quick look at your flicker page and your colour work is great as well! Perhaps you can mix bw and colour?
You certainly have a gift man!
One small observation from me. Some objects and perspectives repeat, for example with the glases 6+7, hiding 8+9, feet 19+20+21, etc. Was that your intention? Or am I counting peas?
It is already late, good night from Europe!
Reimar