ESSAY CONTAINS EXPLICIT CONTENT
This is not a reportage type project, although much of it was taken while I was doing reportage work.
You can rather name it a fairytale than a rough veracity of life, although, again, in the heart of any fairytale lays the truth.
Some of it appears as a proof of existence of marvelous events, some of it is just a digital modified shot that has nothing to do with serious documentary type of work. Ultimately, this was not a planned out unified series.
I feel that I can never do consistent photographic series. My goal is to create a massive and complete view of my tiny and immature inner anxiety. Very slowly, step by step, this micro world is forming from pieces, fragments, shards of the physical world.
The house that Jack built. The circus stage that Kir built.
In the course of the story I’d like to take the opportunity and say hello to my mother. Dear Ma, things are going pretty smoothly, though I look worse. Boris has developed metastases, intestines will be removed. Adah already has lost her breast, but do not worry, it is unnoticeable under her clothes and we have been promised to stew a new one soon, we just need to save up a little first.
Rustam has AIDS. Marta also doesn’t seem very well, but she is always a pain in the s. Neither of them wants to take their pills. Galya has spread her arms and is waiting for applause. A grave has spread its legs and is craving love. Music is starting.
Nevertheless, this story is not about social issues, this story is about the egocentrism of the author who creates some kind of refuge where it is possible to shelter, to forget, so that all our grudges, all our fears would not seem so significant.
A music is starting. A fever is rising. Strike the violin, touch the lute. To wake yourself and to hop into dense weekdays. To give blood for some tests and to leap into a magic world right away. We are invincible while we jump.
Kir Esadov was born in 1988 in Moscow to a circus family.
He received a B.A. in social pedagogy in 2008. After graduating, he worked at a special orphanage for children with severe speech disorders.
In 2011 he graduated from the Rodchenko’s Art School. He had three solo exhibitions in Russia and he also had several group exhibitions in Moscow, Saint Petersburg, Kiev, Zrenjanin, Belgrade.
He has participated at QueerFest 2011 in St. Petersburg and Fotofest 2012 in Houston. At the moment he works as freelance theatre photographer.